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u kno u fucked when u are able to relate to lana del rey songs

I don’t know how I can have sex with well endowed men but when the gyno tries to touch me I have an anxiety attack

"I wonder who’s gonna be by my side in 10 years"
-(via silly-luv)

Goals for last year at Uconn:
Have 0 encounters with Squirmy Wormy Billy

AKA THE MAN WHO TOLD ME TO GO FUCK MYSELF BC I WOULDNT TOUCH HIS DING DONG and now we are enemies

verysmalldeer:

nevecampbell:

I just wanna s*** some d***

HOW MANY DOGS ARE YOU LOOKING TO SELL

I just had a meeting with the CEO and he told me that over 1,000 people applied to this internship.
I was chosen along with 3 other people out of tons of candidates.
Yayyyyyy that makes me happy :)